trees

So i went for a run this morning. It was actually pretty disappointing in a lot of ways. I was pretty out of breath and my mind felt cluttered with crap. I have a problem with worrying, in fact, I worry about worrying, and I found myself getting caught in worry as I heaved through Glen Ellyn, trying not slip on the packed ice. But then something happened, God spoke to me. There are moments in life where in an instant everything changes and I see God. This morning it was almost as if He erased my mind and brought me close, and all i felt was love. I noticed creation and how beautiful it is. It was as if i began to see through new eyes. The things i usually pass in a hurry became props on a grand stage all leading me to the same place-to God.

I'm feeling frustrated right now as I type this, because i feel at a loss for the proper words to describe it. Basically I was overwhelmed by God's love, by His presence in each moment. It is only if we make ourselves available in these moments that we may experience His love and share it with others. It's funny because as I was running I was listening to Death Cab For Cutie and fell in love with one of the song's lyrics. The song goes "instincts are misleading. you shouldn't think what you're feeling. They don't tell you what you know you should want." I really connected with that and was sort of praying that I would just feel God, not think Him. I think sometimes I think God too much. Then, answering my prayer, there I was. It felt like time was standing still, and my purpose was to just love everything I saw, drink it in, get drunk on all the beauty that exists in one moment.

For some reason it was the trees that most captivated me. I was amazed at how they all reach out to the sky in different shapes and forms. They take on a life and personality. They seem so wise. As we dart about our hectic suburban lives they remain in one place. I felt compelled to ask one for advice. If trees could speak, I bet they'd have a lot to say. Some of you may be thinking at this point that i've completely lost it, but the next time you're taking a walk or going for a jog, notice the trees. I'm excited to see them grow green leaves and take on new life in the spring.

Changing gears, I really want to go on a road trip this summer. Does anyone want to come with me? I was re-reading some parts in "Blue Like Jazz" this morning and decided that either by plane or by car I want to go to Portland and go to Donald Miller's church. and if i like it i want to move there or something. Donald Miller was talking about this church he used to go to, a big church that made him feel like he was at the Gap. I love the Gap, don't get me wrong, but I don't think I like worshiping in one. I've been feeling compelled to move lately. At first i thought maybe back to cincinnati, or even better, to the caribbean. Does anyone else feel the same way? Call me.